我想做的。。。

我，有很多话想说，可是又说不出来，不，应该是说我没勇气说出来。。。

我，每天逼着自己要过着规律化的生活，早上起床，刷牙洗脸。。。

照下镜子，看看镜子中的自己，是不是很没有精神，是不是今天的脸特别囧 。。。

在镜子前面对着自己的自己，感觉特别真实，因为可以看到最真实的自己。。。

这位 “ 自己 ” 让自己对自己说 ： “ 你是可以的，你跟别人不一样，你是你，别人是别人。先不理会其他人的存在，你先做该做的，尽本分就好，那就问心无愧。自己可以了，Okay了，才来让别的因素融入，懂吗？懂吗？懂吗？”。。。《虽然多数会先Ignore掉自己，而去顾虑别人在先》。。。囧咯！曾经，有位朋友告诉我，他要我把我自己放在第一位，朋友在第二位，但我始终做不到，过不到自己那一关，怎样都好，我完全无法不顾虑别人》。。。所以，在我心目中，家人永远是第一位，朋友第二，最后才是我。。。这样的我，才会让弟妹们，觉得我很烦，唠叨，长气，年纪轻轻就像阿麽这样，在他们身边，不听地说，说完再说，似乎没尽头般的终点，同样一个道理或话，不懂要重复多少次才甘愿。。。明明知道自己已经说了，但又再重复，因为怕他们没听进去，再加上，我又是一个很讨厌别人把我的话当耳边风的人，所以。。。。。相信你们，身为大姐的人懂吧。。。因此，有时候我真的很想做一下妹妹，很想独自拥有哥哥和姐姐们的保护和呵护，让我成为  “ 公主 ” ，我真的很开心了。。。可惜，在家里，我是老姐！！！

有时候呢，这位 “ 自己 ” 会让自己对自己说 ： 为什么你这么没用？自己也帮不到自己！为什么别人做到，你做不到？该忘的就该统统忘掉，还在留恋什么，期待什么? 最后的期盼只会带来一次又一次的伤害罢了。你的心很强吗？你受得了这一切吗？不要老是装到好像自己很强似的。来一次懦弱，让别人多了解你，帮助你，不行吗？ ” 。。。

这种重复性的动作，几乎已是我的习惯，你说，我自己是不是好像有点不正常叻？嘻嘻。。。

算了，就算我不正常也好，我知道还有我的好朋友们也会陪我不正常的。。。哈哈哈。。。

你看，认识这班人，我有多幸运和多幸福啊？我有空时，要多多陪她们，聊天也好，诉苦也好，总而言之，要保持联络就是了。。。尤其是我槟城的好朋友，有空的时候，我要去找他们，想跟他们一起去旅行，吃美味可口的食物。。。。真的，我很想跟好朋友们去世界各地背包旅行，去我们想去的地方，吃想吃的食物，玩想玩的玩意儿，看美丽的风景，这样的我，很满足了。。。所以我的梦想其实很简单，边做工边背包旅行就满足了。。。

但，要先等我赚了一笔钱，很多东西稳定下来了，这样我才放心去旅行。。。朋友们，要等我哦。。。希望你们能够了解我背后的负担。。。我不能这么自私，只想着去玩，要玩也要等到一切安定了，我才可以实行自己已久的梦想。。。

弟妹的学费和费用的确应该由我来负责了，爸妈辛苦了一辈子，脑子里只有想着怎么去赚钱，我想分担他们的重任，我想让他们去旅行，想让他们的脑子里不再是只顾着赚钱，而是怎么去享受的时候了，还有阿麽的医药费，我也想分担，还有阿公和阿麽都喜欢坐下来一起喝茶吃饭和吃榴莲，所以我想这是我可以孝顺他们的其中一个办法。。。因为我知道舅舅全家人搬出去了，家里只剩下他们俩老，他们一定很希望家里是热热闹闹的，身边有很多孙子孙女们陪着，一起吃饭，嘻嘻哈哈的过日子。。。所以每次我放假回去，我都会去阿麽家住几天，陪阿麽聊天啊，帮忙打扫啊，洗窗帘布啊，抹玻璃窗和玻璃门啊，因为阿麽都没力气走路，洗衣更不行。。。都不明白为什么舅舅和舅母要搬家，住得好好的，现在却搬走了，我不在的时候，谁来帮帮我可怜的阿麽做家务呢？一个两个都不在十字港，一个搬去亚罗士打城市区，一个搬去怡宝，你说，阿麽和阿公两个人，你看我，我看你，两个都是高年纪的人，剩下他们俩在家，是不是很危险又寂寞啊? 你说，对不对？对不对？。。。

哎，没力气说下去了，再说下去，可是没完没了的。。。暂时写到这儿，见啦。。。

Jungle Tracking Day

* Hi, My Dear Friend! It's Times to Update my BloGGie AgaIn *

Today 7am, I went to climb the mountain nearby Kampar~

It was a good day for this activity~

I was so excited and happy to experience this~

I'm just a Newbie, though~

All my friends already have been experienced it~

That's why I feel sorry to them~

As I will delay their journey~

Well, We need to stay frosty from time to time, of course~

And I'll consider myself warned as it's a red mud road there~

Because, the way go up there is very dangerous, oblique and quite slippery~

I'm quite afraid of the height but the slope of the mountain scared me more~

How am I supposed to do that~

I tried to be brave enough and finally I can make it~! Hahaha~! * Happy ing *

My first thought, climbing the mountain is an easy job somehow~

But I was totally wrong~

It's supposed to be a tough job, especially for a newbie~

I never thought that I'm that weak actually~

The truth proof that Yes, I am weak~

I am over-estimated on myself~Haiz~

While I was climbing the mountain, I almost fall down in few times~

Because of my shoe and the slippery road there~

My housemate stayed behind me, keep reminding me " Hey, be careful "~ 

And I was keep reminding my sister "Be Careful Too"~

My little sister replied me and said " You're the one who need to be careful la, not Me! "~

She's kinda bad and naughty, always replied me defiantly~

Wuuu~Wuuu~ @@

In Chinese Version, * 我妹时常顶撞我，气死我啦!* ~

Back to the topic, I really enjoyed the sight-seeing~

Because I LoVe the NatuRal so muchhhhh~ ^ , ^

I like to observe around and see what's besides me~

I like to look around, look at the trees and the flowers~

How Greeny they're? How gorgeous they're? How beautiful of the flowers around?

And so I thought....I'm kind of weirdo, right? I guess so, Hahaha~

Most of the girls love Shopping, but I love Junggle Tracking~

That's somehow is the key here~

Suffice to say, It's My favorite activity! Gosh! Weirdo Girl! Wouldn't you say so?Hahahaha~

Previously, My best friend told me that she always climb the mountain with her father and brother~

I really feel happy on her decision because she try to lose her weight~

Although she's loves to eat anytime and anywhere and therefore cause a raise on her weight~

What's here is She's has made up her mind!~

Nowadays, lose weight no longer is her target, is my target too~

She's really work hard on it, I wish I can follow her~

What's she do I follow, in order to reach our target~

Turn it up, Both of us~!

One day, We will become slim, right?

Alright, It's time to put some pictures here~

                                           Five of Us, Jungle Tracking >>>

                                       Tired, then stopped for shooting >>>
                                       See, How dangerous the road is? >>>

                                                    Our Leaders >>>

                                  Just ignore the orange shirt girl, blurring >>> 

                                             The hard road we taken >>>
                                 *After Pass through the stone and small path*
                                     You can't imagine how hard the road is.

                                         Now, go through the stone >>>

                                           Stopped at Bamboo Tree >>>
                                          * This guy wanna take a shot *

   Reach the Down Turning Point >>>

                                       Finally We, no longer gasping >>>
                                            * Shot for our memory *

                                             Said "Bye" to the road >>>

                                   Having Breakfast at Old Town, Kampar >>>

                                           This one nice, called 清汤伊面

Alright, Here I Stop Writing, Bye~

Nonsense Today...！Haha！

Yesterday, My friend, my housemate, my sis and I have been jog in the garden nearby. On that day, a lot of people brought their doggie to have a walk and play with them. While, a girl sit nearby the fench and do nothing. Uhm...Nope, she seem like having a lot of thinking and sit around, just like stick it there alone. Well, I try to figure it out with my own observation during jog around. I was thinking that she, perhaps faced some trouble and seek for help from her friend because her face looks suffered. After I ran about 2 big circles, I meet her again and saw that she got her friend besides and try to help her stand up and then go back already. That's proof my inference is accurate. Haha, not everytime I can make it, though...Still, I need to work hard on this as I am quite weak on observation...Try hard, try hard, I can make it!

Another one is I heard a sentences, quoting from a child. Apology here as I need to change to Chinese version, i.e. 不动草地怎么运动喔？Which means " How to exercise without touching grass on the ground.".....That child seem quite funny and will be a smart boy in the future, I just have a random guess on him...but hope my random guess will become true. Haha, I speak nonsense here...The way I release my stress....exam almost coming...Brace...! PhoeBe! U must do it...! Turn it Up...!

This week and coming week almost have nothing to do, and the only thing that I can do is study, study and study....to prepare myself for the coming frighten exam...LoL...I am going insane again...Hahahaa...Joking here....I won't put myself on that way....Thus, I plan to go climb the mountain nearby on this coming Saturday with my housemates and friends...I never climb the mountain, that's y I am very excited right now. Hope my plan won't be fell through again, god bless! Hahahaa....excited much! God bless everything of mine, i.e my exam, my plan, my grand-parent and my parent's health as well. It's a long story and began with a call. My youngest sister gave me a call last few days and scare me to the death...She said my dad almost faint and luckily my brother gave a glass of sweet water to him and my dad was then awake...God bless...

So, topic today is I have make a mashed potatoes, of course with my friend as well. That is the point today...Hahaa, I am not going do that alone. Anyway, the mashed potatoes is delightful. I am quite satisfied with my own work. My next target is cooking dishes. I wish to learn it. I want to cook. I want to cook. * Bitching silently * >>>Actually I hate cook....Hahahaa...Syhhh...<<< Anyway, If my cook is fail, then ever the pessimist, try again until I can do it. It's my quote>>>The UnDead Spirit...Hahahaa....I have to make myself believe on my own before people believe on Me....Agree upon me?

August!

August makes me hard to sleep~

Because the final exam is coming soon~

August makes me feel happy~

Beacause it's gonna be holiday soon~

August, definitely, scare to to the death~

Because 31 August will be the ghost day for Chinese~

August makes my life busier~

Because my groups study gonna start very soon~

August makes my life bored~

Because it's nothing to entertain me for sure~

Since it's time to be serious on study~

My August life, full of boring things~

However, I am not gonna put myself on that ways~

It's not gonna the way that I only have to go~

*Counting my fingers and thinking*~

1,2,3,1,2,3~

Sports, will be my next station~

Sports will be my spirits and bring me to the life that supposes to be~

As it's gonna go through no matter how～

Busier I Am, ya, It's me! That's gonna be my life~

My August Life~

Two Bad Luck Incidents Happened in 3 days...

It just so happens and make me look bad...

And just realized that I am so pathetic...

I've always wanted to ask...

Why I always looks pathetic?

God, you looks like you're going after me...

You sure you're up for this?

Could you please make my life better?

This is only what I wish to get it...

Don't make my life rich of these kinds of incident...

Don't.....Don't....Don't.......Please.....

Let me get through my life in peace....

Will you? Oh God, I beg on you, please......

There is no other people going to have this...

I am the only one in the world....

What?! Two bad luck incidents happened on me within 3 days....

I am the great one in the whole world I guess...

And the most "lucky" one....Sucks.... !

真的很讨厌看到你！

昨天和今天，我遇到了一个男孩子。。。

是我非常讨厌的一个人。。。

他，竟然出现在我眼前。。。

看到他的时候，我急忙地找人遮掩。。。

只想躲在人们之中，然后茫茫然地走过。。。

希望他看不见我，看不见我。。。

不然，我又要对他忍吞下气。。。

这个男孩子谎话篇篇。。。

只要是从他嘴里说出来的话绝不能相信。。。

他这个人曾经骗过很多人。。。

我也是其中一个。。。

所幸有一位朋友从火坑中把我救出来。。。

谢谢你啊，神秘人！

有时候，真的很想往他的脸蛋儿刮一巴掌。。。

可是每次遇见了他都下不了手。。。

看来，我是世界上最没用的了。。。

很希望会有一个人代替我的手。。。

向着他的脸冲去。。。

这样的话，我会很感激的！

看来，我是真的太容易相信人了。。。

这样的我，一定要改，一定要改。。。

别人说的话，一定要怀疑一下下才对。。。

这个忠告，好，我答应你，我记住了。。。

爱心，你收到了吗？

不知哪一年的冬至开始，我妈咪都会搓五颜六色的汤圆，以前我妈咪只搓三种颜色的汤圆。。。

自从听说汤圆也有别的颜色后，也就是说有不一样的味道，我妈咪就毫不犹豫地去学了，因为她知道我喜欢吃汤圆。。。

今天，我实在无所事事，整天呆在房里，快要闷死，发霉了。。。

于是心血来潮再加上神经有点不正常的我，决定搓汤圆。。。

(*^__^*) 嘻嘻……不正常吧？我也是那么觉得。。。

我最爱，最爱，最爱的汤圆，我来了。。。

其实，汤圆真的真的真的是最容易煮的糖水了，因为只需要糯米粉就可以了。。。

问题是在于是否汤圆咬起来有弹性，Q吗？是否您有耐心搓汤圆？

表面上汤圆真的超容易做的，但搓汤圆的过程其实一点也不容易，搓得太快的汤圆不圆不好看，搓得太慢的汤圆却会变得不好吃，硬了，也就是失去了弹性。。。

除此，搓汤圆也带来了腰酸背痛，一阵阵的痛换来了一碗好吃的汤圆，我想是值得的，正所谓：“先苦后甜” 嘛。。。

所以说嘛，搓汤圆的时候要有足够的耐心和爱心，这样才会搓出好吃的汤圆哦。。。

你说，对不对？O(∩_∩)O哈哈~

因此，不喜欢吃汤圆的朋友，就算有多不想吃或者讨厌吃也好，也请你们吃几口吧，因为那里面充满了许多爱心，难道你们真的不吃，难道你们不觉得可惜吗？

在我眼里，重要的不是在于汤圆好不好吃，而是在于汤圆里的爱心，你收到了吗？

这就是我想说的。。。

还有，今天除了搓汤圆以外，我和我妹煮了些东炎米粉汤，因为厌腻了外面的食物。。。

不喜欢下厨的我会好好努力地学着，我想为我的家人，我的好朋友和我未来的男朋友下厨。。。好想让他们试下我的厨艺，好吃的话赞下我，不好吃的话请鼓励我，这就是我需要的支持和安慰，不管怎样，碧萱大小姐，要加油哦！

碧萱 上